My heart breaks..

Each time I dropped Aiman at daycare

Semalam mangkit pagi dia tanya daddy, Can I stay at home today? I thought it was monday blues..
Bila pi hantaq dia macam x dak mood

But pagi tadi pun x berapa nak mau pi

Dah byk kali tanya bila dia boleh pi big school

I feel terribly guilty..

My priority have changed so much, dulu, my aim was to become a specialist, nak jadi gynae or paediatrician, ramai org tanya awat buat GP, awat x ambik benda lain..

I want too, but I will also have to sacrifice a lot of family time, these specialties are more 'demanding' and less flexible, kena buat calls, nights etc..yes, I will have higher earning potentials..but I want more time for my kids when they still need me..nanti dah besar,dah independent, dah x heran dah kat mummy, waktu tu la baru mummy habis study, baru ada masa untuk depa

I don't understand why a certain family member frowned upon at me when I took long unpaid leaves to look after Aiman and Aliya when they were born..

Yes, our parents worked when we were small, but they never had to leave us to 'orang luar' or daycare like my children had to go through.

Me and my brother were looked after by our grandparents. So were noorwan and his sister. My sister was looked after by a really nice family, and so was noorwan's sister..

I wish Aliya and Aiman won't have to go through this dilemma with their children.